Ok php5 was the fix for the problem.
I was trying to set the board up like it was on shared, worked good on shared [cept for blowing up the CPU] should work as it was set up on VPS.
Naaay says the horse.
Support changed the add handler to php5 and walla, no more white pages.
[note on shared it only worked with said add handler set to php4, though that was before the 141 upgrade, though 141 worked on shared with the php4, 141 don't like php4 on VPS.]
# Use PHP4 as default
AddHandler application/x-httpd-php5 .php
<IfModule>
# suPHP_ConfigPath /home/xvnetwor
suPHP_ConfigPath /home/vtfvpsx3
</IfModule>